Monday, February 11, 2008
a game of guess.
As I stared at the ground while waiting for the train, I thought to myself, “Is this the end of everything which I thought had just began? Is it about time I forgot and let things go, FOR REAL, and not hang on anymore?” Every time I turned to take a glance, I don’t see any hints anymore, even if I have eye contact with you, it doesn’t seem to say anything, which I once saw. Please tell me it’s all just the wrong timing? Then again, maybe I should just really, for real and for good, let go and let nature take its course? Maybe we’ll take the longer and much painful route before we get there. Or maybe, right from the start, we were never meant to be and it was all just bluff and playing the game of guess. Fun as it may be, someone always has to get hurt in the game of guess, and it’s inevitable. Another experience, yet another story to tell, it always seem to be the same with each passing year, when will it really happen? When will it be true? Should I just ask for an answer after my exams? At least I know I have time to get over it and not be distracted. So many questions, so little hints. When your mum came up with an ang bao, your brother was standing beside me and smiling at his mum as she gave me the ang bao, I think I’m thinking too much, but could it be a sign? Could it also be a sign that your brother has been talking to me more often than usual? Ok, I think I’m thinking too much and being over-sensitive about this. Could you be the one and only that has impressed me so much that you’re hurting me every time I think of you and see you? And even things that remind me of you? I really want to forget about you, I really just want you to disappear right before me and to never ever be reminded about anything else ever again. I wish it was that period of time where I just gave up completely, then again, I guess I need to start from scratch. If it is a yes, I just hope it’ll be real soon. Why am I still harboring hopes when I said I wanted to let go completely? It’s 134am, it’s time to sleep and prepare for my paper tomorrow.
Labels: when everything starts falling apart.
watching the sunset with you
1:35 AM
