Friday, August 11, 2006
mixed emotions.
i was definitely more capable of better results, but i did not prove my capability in my results. i wanted a 3, but i got a 6 & only a Pass for my oral/aural. ok, i was pretty alright when i managed to pass my orals cux i thought i would fail, i seriously didnt perform well durin my orals at all esp durin the passage readin, i was fallin all over my words & my enounciations were just upside-down. but so what? io only had a 6 for my written which i think is totally horrible though i found the paper pretty difficult. ok, my point is, i think i couldve failed but by God's grace, i didnt, i found it real hard & thought i wrote out of point for my letter-writin but i passed. but im still pretty upset bout my results cux 6 was DEFINITELY the marks i DO NOT want. im definitely capable of MUCH more. more muggings & late nights ahead. freetime, no more freetime anymore, ill have to cut down a whole lot on it if i want my 12pts.
certain things has been gettin to me too. it just floods my mind at times tt i just start to daze & time just freezes for me or sometimes i even go back in history. maybe it's the stress im puttin on myself & the pressure too. everybody arounds me have high expectations, i dont wna let em dwn, neither do i wanna let myself dwn. i HAVE & MUST get down to proper work, if i con't this way, im def gettin NOWHERE at all. if ive been gettin u ppl agitated or if ive been throwin my temptraunts at u ppl, im sorry, it's just the stress & pressure gettin to me. pls just bare w me for a few mths more. when it's over, ill get back to how i used to be, the jovial me. there are certain stuffs on my mind which i too need to settle, so pls dont mind if i shld appear really out of sorts. SORRY TO ONE AND ALL.
watching the sunset with you
11:42 PM
