Friday, June 23, 2006
LOST!!
SHAQ!! im so screwed!! my homework are all half-way done, with such a slack & thrashy attitude, where is it gonna get me?! im just so screwed!! & i need help for my chem which i didnt ask ahma when she was around?! shes gonna kill me! ok, i dont know why but im feelin lost today? dont tell me it's all comin back to me now? surely not...... all i know now is that ive got to work extremely hard and get into the course i want, but considerin my attitude towards work, where am i going to get myself in? of course i dont want to disappoint the people around me & myself. i said if i can get into a JC, i will consider, but i guess i can thrash that idea considerin my attitude. like 9pts?! HAH!! PLEASE~! just another one of my naive & unrealistic thoughts that got to me again. ARGH!!! thats one, theres one more.
hes leavin for UK in a wk's time, so how does it bother me. i myself am quite clueless. i dont know, he left me thinkin & totally quizzical this few days. maybe it's because ive fallen sick since wed so ive been thinkin quite a bit, but it's an excuse. i still rmb the way he responded to my qns, it took him 3secs & was rather hesitant. ARGH!!! and then at the party, ok, this one, im not quite sure cux i was seriously comatosed at that point in time & apart from that, i took like 3secs to react?! thats a little too long, reason? there was something on my mind. somehow, ive got this thing tellin me that he probably still feels for me hence all the avoiding. what i think is, if a guy doesnt like you anymore, they wouldnt avoid you, they'll treat you normally, not like a plague. am i missin him? this is outrageous! i dont know why guys just love to leave girls in the lurch thinkin they'll get it sorted out themselves, the way they act towards you is just so cryptic, how are you suppose to get anything right?! they keep u guessin thinkin it's fun & ull evetually figure it out without havin them tell you, HARLOW!! we're not pyschic!! PLEASE!!! i just hope ull let me out of this wilderness soon & i wouldnt have to guess any longer. my intuition might be wrong, they might be right, i dont know which it is, i just hope the answer will come soon. maybe it's bad news thats y u asked me to concentrate on my studies 1st, maybe not, i dont know. maybe im gettin my hopes a little too high now. EARTH CALLIN SOCKX!!! ARGH!!!
AH MA!!! HURRY UP COME BACK!!! YOUR GRANDCHILD/AUNT/GOOD OL BUDDY NEEDS YOU!!!
watching the sunset with you
10:50 PM
